Now...psychologically..the parts of our body that are out of mind and sight...are said to represent the emotional and psychological nature of the person....so here you are.
You walk into a club..find the hottest little thang in there...you know what i'm talking about...the tight booty...the curviness..the ribbling...whatever...the soft skin...etc...they are the epitomy of yumminess. Now if you are so fortunate as to take them home (or have them take you home) you begin to get down with them...start to get hot and steamy...and as you are slowing working your way down...their feet are jacked up.
You all know what i'm talking about...the stubby toe...the chipped nails..the dry calloused feet that remind you of your vienna sausages and if you're really lucky...sausages topped with pudding.
Now we've been there!! hot everything and jacked up feet...could you do it? As we all know...wearing sandals is privilege...not a right (just like spandex or banana hammocks). anyways...Dr. Stephens (? from the university of missouri) would argue that the feet are the pathway to seduction...the start of sexual intimacy...why? i'm glad you questioned that last statement...for those of you who do not know...foot sense in the motor cortex of the brain are next door neighbors to the gentalia reflex and sensors in our bodies...huh? in other words...why do you think the ladies (and men) enjoy foot rubs so much? it's because it stimulates in other ways baby...look it up!
anyways..PSYCH!SENSE ...perhaps a person feet...those things furthest away from our insight and mind provide detail to the small things that they hold. Pay attention to detais...
p.s. manicures are not a privilege they are just right.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Saturday, December 12, 2009
55. What's worse?
this will be quick and easy...what's worse? psychological embarrasment or physical embarassment...the answer? well...depends on the person and the age to which we are addressing...I have found that those of an older generation find that psychological embarrasment is far worse than anything physical....but the younger cats say that phsycial embarrassment is scarier...why? becuase they feel they wear their "something" on their sleeve. There is this idea that the older you get...the more psychological you become....
Death of the hero...and birth of the soul. I make reference to this often...PSYCH!SENSE of the attributes of life and age. As we grow older...we stop caring about the physical so much when we try and work for the mental and psychological strength and power.
ideas?
Death of the hero...and birth of the soul. I make reference to this often...PSYCH!SENSE of the attributes of life and age. As we grow older...we stop caring about the physical so much when we try and work for the mental and psychological strength and power.
ideas?
Thursday, December 10, 2009
54. Being average...
The only way a medication is approved for use by the FDA is when it marginally outperforms the control. it does not have to work...it only has to work "marginally" better than the control. WTF is that? what does this mean? This means that being average is freakin awesome.
Now before I get into it...lets define average. It means neither here nor there...it means in the middle it even means you're more likely to fit into a pair of jeans.
Consider it? if you're average as we have all learned from commercial...things are more likely to work for you. You'll most likely find that pair of jeans (because manufacturers make more of them) you're most likely to respond to medications...you're most likely to marry young, divorce earlier and then get remarried again. Good times if you ask me. The problem? how do you stand out in the field of grass?
the comical...remember that the tallest blade of grass in the field of life...is always the one to get cut down first.
live on high achievers....life on!
Now before I get into it...lets define average. It means neither here nor there...it means in the middle it even means you're more likely to fit into a pair of jeans.
Consider it? if you're average as we have all learned from commercial...things are more likely to work for you. You'll most likely find that pair of jeans (because manufacturers make more of them) you're most likely to respond to medications...you're most likely to marry young, divorce earlier and then get remarried again. Good times if you ask me. The problem? how do you stand out in the field of grass?
the comical...remember that the tallest blade of grass in the field of life...is always the one to get cut down first.
live on high achievers....life on!
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
53. Business suit or rags?
As I go back to the idea of stereotyping and initial reactions I came to question...Would you be more willing to accept advice from someone in a suit or someone in...well...rags? Now I hate to put it so blatant...consider if you were to walk into a doctor's office and at the helm you see a man in rags...that smells bad and looks like...yeah. anyways...I would also question how people make a connection to what people want from others. I had an interesting conversation with some people that claim that they want someone who is successful...fancy car..good suit because they konw what it is to succeed. The local barista on the other hand said that she would prefer to take the advice of a "homeless" guy becuase he most like knows exactly what got him to that place...meaning! he is more likely to steer you clear...away from the decisions he made. isn't this interesting? not that I have to say that to try and capture you into the statement...how often have we se an angel in disguise...jesus in a tortilla? help can come from all avenues if you allow your soul to join with the soul of the world. The become one with the life that we live and are part of...the next time you run into someone you think is...different...perhaps you should try and consider their different opinion.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
52. Fancy Cars?
Now as I have written about before in the tattoo rant...I question the background and rationale for fancy cars. Many take it as a sign of success...luxury...I instead question the rationale for wanting to show the world how successful you are. Is there any need and drive to show others how good you look? how fancy and sexy you have become by showing other what you're worth? I had one person once tell me, "I know you make good money...why do you drive that kind of car?"...my response was along the lines..."why does the the car I drive show the value of who i am?" what do you guys think? How much of driving a fancy car is for the sake of others?...compared to the sake of your own feelings and mental health?
Sunday, November 1, 2009
51. N.U.T.s
Hold on to your N.U.T.s!
Here's a topic men rarely discuss. Self esteem. Which is why I'm typing about it. Does that make me a man? Not really. Okay, first thought. There's a difference between insecurity and self esteem. Everyone is insecure and if they say they're not, they're really insecure. Anything someone has to announce usually means the opposite. Anyway, I don't like my nose. My grandmother used to say I have a strawberry nose and that if I sat in the bathroom squeezing it, it would get thin. I spent many hours in the dark squeezing my nose as a kid. We all have these stories. But self esteem runs deeper. It has to do with worth and how much you value yourself. Although physical features may attribute to self esteem, I think at the core it starts from childhood and how you were raised. Parents are supposed to exercise your "worth" muscle. If you were spoiled and enabled, your self esteem was hindered. Value is earned. This is why you see a lot of beautiful people with low self esteem. Or if you didn't get praised, your esteem lacked development and you end up filling that void with overtime at work, Louis Vutton handbags, or desperately trying to find the perfect partner, which means you're very lonely. Or settle, which means you're very lonely.
Quick story. When I was ten I wanted to build this model airplane. It was one of those really elaborate models that wives hated because their husbands would display them all over the living room like they were Picassos. Or maybe that was just the 80's. There were a lot of man toys in the 80's. Remember the fancy remote control cars adults would race on the weekends. Anyway, after begging my dad he finally gave me twenty bucks to buy it. I ran across the street and handed my neighbor, a miserable beer chugging racist wife beater running a hobby shop out of his garage, the cash. I don't remember him handing me the box. All I remember is the alcohol on his breath and him mumbling "no refunds". My dad looked at the model and told me there was no way I could build this. I was determined to prove him wrong. So as my dad read the Times, or maybe he was clipping his toe nails on it, I was frantically assembling a million pieces of Balsa wood. Three hours later, nothing but a pile of Popsicle sticks in my lap. My airplane looked more like a frisbee. Then to top it off my dad tells me I wasted his money. My worth was minimized that day. You get the point.
Of course, any kind of abuse where something was taken from you, parents fighting, negativity in the house, can all contribute to one's opinion of what they're worth. And childhood isn't the only thing that molds your esteem. Remember when Chad stole your skateboard everyday after school for a year, Heather called you a dorkface as you were trying to sit next to her at lunch, Erine made fun of your pecker in the locker room, and that really quick night you lost your virginity?
So why don't we talk about self esteem as adults? I think we're too busy covering it up with a career, wife, and kids. I think as men get wrapped up in what we think being a "man" is, we lose ourselves. I think instead of building esteem, we begin to cover it up. There's a thin line between riding a motorcycle because it truly excites you and you're good at it or because you're trying to prove something. No one knows except you. If it brings you worth, you are building esteem. If you're trying to be sexy, you are hiding. Sell the bike and help your son build a model plane.
Talking about our self esteem also means we have to be vulnerable, which a lot of guys aren't comfortable doing because they may feel like they're less of a "man". How many guys do you know that sit around a poker table and talk about how they can improve their self esteem?
But here's the deal. If your self esteem is low, it will be difficult for to hold on to your N.U.T.s, as Wayne M. Levine would say. N.U.T. stands for non-negotiable unalterable terms. These are non-negotiable terms that define who you are. For example, one might be "I do what I believe is in the best interest of my kids, even if they disagree". Or "I do not indulge in my addictions". "Or I will be faithful". Women aren't attracted to a man without N.U.T.s. This is because women will not trust you anymore. Once there is no trust, there is no relationship because trust is the foundations of any relationship.
How did we go from self esteem to nuts? I have no idea. I'm a notorious bird walker. But men, hold on to them and if you don't have any, grow a pair. Parents, praise your children and give them exercises that build their worth, not toys and cute clothes. And women, get some therapy. You're all fucking crazy.
Joke.
Kinda.
(...John you're awesome)
Here's a topic men rarely discuss. Self esteem. Which is why I'm typing about it. Does that make me a man? Not really. Okay, first thought. There's a difference between insecurity and self esteem. Everyone is insecure and if they say they're not, they're really insecure. Anything someone has to announce usually means the opposite. Anyway, I don't like my nose. My grandmother used to say I have a strawberry nose and that if I sat in the bathroom squeezing it, it would get thin. I spent many hours in the dark squeezing my nose as a kid. We all have these stories. But self esteem runs deeper. It has to do with worth and how much you value yourself. Although physical features may attribute to self esteem, I think at the core it starts from childhood and how you were raised. Parents are supposed to exercise your "worth" muscle. If you were spoiled and enabled, your self esteem was hindered. Value is earned. This is why you see a lot of beautiful people with low self esteem. Or if you didn't get praised, your esteem lacked development and you end up filling that void with overtime at work, Louis Vutton handbags, or desperately trying to find the perfect partner, which means you're very lonely. Or settle, which means you're very lonely.
Quick story. When I was ten I wanted to build this model airplane. It was one of those really elaborate models that wives hated because their husbands would display them all over the living room like they were Picassos. Or maybe that was just the 80's. There were a lot of man toys in the 80's. Remember the fancy remote control cars adults would race on the weekends. Anyway, after begging my dad he finally gave me twenty bucks to buy it. I ran across the street and handed my neighbor, a miserable beer chugging racist wife beater running a hobby shop out of his garage, the cash. I don't remember him handing me the box. All I remember is the alcohol on his breath and him mumbling "no refunds". My dad looked at the model and told me there was no way I could build this. I was determined to prove him wrong. So as my dad read the Times, or maybe he was clipping his toe nails on it, I was frantically assembling a million pieces of Balsa wood. Three hours later, nothing but a pile of Popsicle sticks in my lap. My airplane looked more like a frisbee. Then to top it off my dad tells me I wasted his money. My worth was minimized that day. You get the point.
Of course, any kind of abuse where something was taken from you, parents fighting, negativity in the house, can all contribute to one's opinion of what they're worth. And childhood isn't the only thing that molds your esteem. Remember when Chad stole your skateboard everyday after school for a year, Heather called you a dorkface as you were trying to sit next to her at lunch, Erine made fun of your pecker in the locker room, and that really quick night you lost your virginity?
So why don't we talk about self esteem as adults? I think we're too busy covering it up with a career, wife, and kids. I think as men get wrapped up in what we think being a "man" is, we lose ourselves. I think instead of building esteem, we begin to cover it up. There's a thin line between riding a motorcycle because it truly excites you and you're good at it or because you're trying to prove something. No one knows except you. If it brings you worth, you are building esteem. If you're trying to be sexy, you are hiding. Sell the bike and help your son build a model plane.
Talking about our self esteem also means we have to be vulnerable, which a lot of guys aren't comfortable doing because they may feel like they're less of a "man". How many guys do you know that sit around a poker table and talk about how they can improve their self esteem?
But here's the deal. If your self esteem is low, it will be difficult for to hold on to your N.U.T.s, as Wayne M. Levine would say. N.U.T. stands for non-negotiable unalterable terms. These are non-negotiable terms that define who you are. For example, one might be "I do what I believe is in the best interest of my kids, even if they disagree". Or "I do not indulge in my addictions". "Or I will be faithful". Women aren't attracted to a man without N.U.T.s. This is because women will not trust you anymore. Once there is no trust, there is no relationship because trust is the foundations of any relationship.
How did we go from self esteem to nuts? I have no idea. I'm a notorious bird walker. But men, hold on to them and if you don't have any, grow a pair. Parents, praise your children and give them exercises that build their worth, not toys and cute clothes. And women, get some therapy. You're all fucking crazy.
Joke.
Kinda.
(...John you're awesome)
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
50. Work out
Why go to therapy? Why go to try and talk about your feeligns and thoughts..."YOU'RE SO GAY...YOU'RE SO PSYCHO...YOU'RE SO STUPID" ahhhhh yes that many many responses you can recieve. I was talking to a friend of mine who is a track coach. He tells..."ya know dude...my kids are not working as hard as they can be...my best girl only ran 80 miles this week..." my response is somewhere along the lines of, "you mean...uh...WTF...80 MILES!!!...sounds like hard work to me." his response was "well I mean yeah..you have to keep working at it and working at it and working at it..."
My PSYCH!SENSE came on...
So as i've come to deduce...marathon runners...have to keep running in order to stay marathon runners...weight lifters have to keep weight lifting to stay strong...wouldn't it pass the test to state that maybe those who are mentally sane should at least be willing to talk to someone at times to stay mentally sane?
If you have to continue to stay healthy by eating right and exercising continually...it sounds about right to be willing to go to therapy (and I use this loosely because therapy can be a friend...a dog...a cat...a journal) that will allow for use to stay mentally healthy. Just my 2 cents.
My PSYCH!SENSE came on...
So as i've come to deduce...marathon runners...have to keep running in order to stay marathon runners...weight lifters have to keep weight lifting to stay strong...wouldn't it pass the test to state that maybe those who are mentally sane should at least be willing to talk to someone at times to stay mentally sane?
If you have to continue to stay healthy by eating right and exercising continually...it sounds about right to be willing to go to therapy (and I use this loosely because therapy can be a friend...a dog...a cat...a journal) that will allow for use to stay mentally healthy. Just my 2 cents.
Friday, October 23, 2009
49. Meaning of life...kinda
I often get into interesting discussions about the psychological world and where we are now. When I try and speak about the language and soul of the world I am usually thrown an awkward eye...an almost teasing glance. Many regular people get it though...it's usually the smart and most intelligent ones that don't. Funny huh? I find myself always talking to other physicians about their beliefs of meaning in life. Usually they'll ask me,
"Do you REALLY believe that meaning exists in all things?"
my response..."absolutely!...life is full of meaning..everything...from the smallest rock to the largest body of people..."
"oh come on now...how could you truly believe that? I can understand that meaning and soul in people...and I can understand how telling patient that kind of stuff will make them feel better...but seriously...rocks? things? objects?"
I love smiling and letting them vent on and on about their beliefs...
My response if usually along these lines..."Do you have a picture of your family?"
Usually they do...in their office or wallet or seomthign of the sort...
I then grab at it and start to pretend and tear it...
"HEY THATS MY PICTURE!!! THAT"S MY FAMILY...WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!!?!?"
I smile and ask them..."what do you mean? to me it's simply ink on a piece of paper that has people on it that YOU recognize as family...in reality it's just ink"
hahahah...of course they take a second refuse to acknowledge it and instead start on new conversations. The fact is that we attach meaning to all things...look at wedding rings...look at pictures...look at baseball logos! the soul and meaning of things and in turn are exactly what we put into it.
"Do you REALLY believe that meaning exists in all things?"
my response..."absolutely!...life is full of meaning..everything...from the smallest rock to the largest body of people..."
"oh come on now...how could you truly believe that? I can understand that meaning and soul in people...and I can understand how telling patient that kind of stuff will make them feel better...but seriously...rocks? things? objects?"
I love smiling and letting them vent on and on about their beliefs...
My response if usually along these lines..."Do you have a picture of your family?"
Usually they do...in their office or wallet or seomthign of the sort...
I then grab at it and start to pretend and tear it...
"HEY THATS MY PICTURE!!! THAT"S MY FAMILY...WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!!?!?"
I smile and ask them..."what do you mean? to me it's simply ink on a piece of paper that has people on it that YOU recognize as family...in reality it's just ink"
hahahah...of course they take a second refuse to acknowledge it and instead start on new conversations. The fact is that we attach meaning to all things...look at wedding rings...look at pictures...look at baseball logos! the soul and meaning of things and in turn are exactly what we put into it.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
48. Attraction theory
In the world there exists a natural "living" language and entity. The anima and animus. FOr the sake of simplicity...I will only about about the spirit of the anima. She is the ideal image of a woman...the perfect capitulation of what a perfection would be. As we are born the mother becomes almost like a living entity of that said spirit. She is the embodiment of the perfect image. Unforunately mother also is not perfect...she makes mistakes and it is on us to help remedy this and build ourselves up from this "disappointment." As we grow up we continue trying to find the original mother...the original anima (eventhough she is already with us) and will go to any length to try and find her. We grow up with a feeling of emptiness...a feeling of not being complete. We find ourselves strving for what we have never had. This is where bad relationships start. The power or attraction...the power of opposites...the unruling force that is the anima and attraction. How beautiful she is. The abused child will seek the abuser...the rape victim will look for a ruling male....the gender confused child will find exactly what she/he needs. This is the difficulty. Isn't it interesting how the child of a substance abuse mother will in turn to a lover with an addiciton problem.
How cyclic! how horribly sweet it is to find and strive for the exact person that you once felt was horrible and unavailable. We are trying to find the woman that is just like our mother or father...trying to find the person that will bring up back to completeness and wholeness. You must be willing to face your opposite (because you'll probably be unexplicably attracted to them)and when given the opportunity...or if you forced to take the opportunity you must be willing to spit him in the face and shove a finger in his face. Identification with that lustful and needed image does allow for a shallow connection but will fall in the long run. Be willing to hold yourself to a high level or courage and be willing to throw out all the things that you feel are right for you...yes it sucks...yes it hurts...you will try to fix your problems through them and you will try and seek the part of yourself in them but unltimately you must leanr to find a new part...build a new part...become part of a new part of yourself and others. Empty your cup...and let someone else...through someone else...in someone or something else refill it up along with your soul. Do not be seduced by the beautiful sirens of the endless ocean.
How cyclic! how horribly sweet it is to find and strive for the exact person that you once felt was horrible and unavailable. We are trying to find the woman that is just like our mother or father...trying to find the person that will bring up back to completeness and wholeness. You must be willing to face your opposite (because you'll probably be unexplicably attracted to them)and when given the opportunity...or if you forced to take the opportunity you must be willing to spit him in the face and shove a finger in his face. Identification with that lustful and needed image does allow for a shallow connection but will fall in the long run. Be willing to hold yourself to a high level or courage and be willing to throw out all the things that you feel are right for you...yes it sucks...yes it hurts...you will try to fix your problems through them and you will try and seek the part of yourself in them but unltimately you must leanr to find a new part...build a new part...become part of a new part of yourself and others. Empty your cup...and let someone else...through someone else...in someone or something else refill it up along with your soul. Do not be seduced by the beautiful sirens of the endless ocean.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
47. Timeframe
This motivation came from a reading I did a few weeks back. I have discovered that there exist 2 types of time. The real time that is held on your wrist and the psychological time that exists in our mind. The real time is decently easy...it's what we are doing in this exact moment...this exact time frame. Whereas psychological time is the time in which the past experiences we've lived and the future ones we will live exist. HUH?!! What i'm saying is that...hmm..what am I saying...if we look back at our lives...how many of us can actually say, "fuck..what was I thinking? why did I let him or her do that to me? was I really that naiive?...why did I wear that outfit?" We can look back at our past life and truly start to see our mistakes. When we look to our future we always hold some sort of idealized state of mind..."I will lose weight by going to the gym 8 times a day and eating healthy and donating....blah blah blh" that is our future psychological time. Isn't is funny how that works out? We are seemingly holding this amazing idealized/perfect time in our minds. We are enlightened as the buddha would say....we can easily see where we have gone wrong and how we can change where we are going.
But why then...why do we then fall back into bad situations and hold these horrible habits? It is because in our real time...our present time...the ego has taken control of our voice and minds. "THE WHAT!?!?!?" ...ya know...the ego. The ego will live in the moment (sometimes the past and future too..but lets not get into that) and will force us to live out our horrible feelings. It has been designed to protect us and mold our situations. It will continue to force us to move and work in it's direction without thought. This is why we are still obese and unable to stick to our plan...this is why we still hold prejudice and bias...this is why we are living the way we are.
We must learn to live in the uncomfortable...we must learn to hold ourselves to a different level of expectation and build the "mental toughness" that resiliency to overcome our hurt and pain.
Build your mental toughness.
But why then...why do we then fall back into bad situations and hold these horrible habits? It is because in our real time...our present time...the ego has taken control of our voice and minds. "THE WHAT!?!?!?" ...ya know...the ego. The ego will live in the moment (sometimes the past and future too..but lets not get into that) and will force us to live out our horrible feelings. It has been designed to protect us and mold our situations. It will continue to force us to move and work in it's direction without thought. This is why we are still obese and unable to stick to our plan...this is why we still hold prejudice and bias...this is why we are living the way we are.
We must learn to live in the uncomfortable...we must learn to hold ourselves to a different level of expectation and build the "mental toughness" that resiliency to overcome our hurt and pain.
Build your mental toughness.
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