Rather than asking why something has happened, meaning
causal, learn to instead ask what did it happen for.
I believe that when we do this, it changes our perspective…instead
of being helpless and victim, we become the means and tools of understanding
and growth.
If I were in an accident that totaled my car, it would be
easy for me to get down on myself, blame myself for some mistake…maybe I should
have left five minutes earlier…maybe I shouldn’t have stopped for coffee…I
should have payed more attention…I should have blah blah blah…all these
extraneous events lead us to feel small, less than, and out of control. It turns us into victims and helpless. It forces us to live in the past and consider
all the places we made mistakes.
Instead, if I learn to instead ask “what did it happen for”
or in other words, “what the hell can I learn from this?” I can now use the
event as a means to build and learn. I
turn from victim to victor…I am able to understand now that the possible reason
for the experience of the totaled car, has taught me to appreciate life for
example. It’s forward thinking. It’s movement and growth.
Deeper than this, “what can I learn from this” puts me into
a place of possibility that allows a deeper understanding of events and
actions. It gives you back your sense of
control and allows you to feel as the driver of your own car versus the
passenger of a speeding vehicle. Change
your mind set and move from passenger to driver.
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