193. Touch yourself ;)

When it comes to romantic relationships, can you really truly be in love with multiple persons? Perhaps not all at once, but if you are in a romantic relationship and are in love with your partner, when you meet someone else and fall in love with that new person, were you really in love with the original partner to begin with?
How many "true loves" are you "allowed" in a life time? I personally know someone who believes she falls in love with all of the partners she has been involved with romantically, but I'm not so sure I believe her when she says she has been IN love with each and every one of them. I understand that there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone, so could it be confusion between the two since it can be overlapping at times?



First...one question at a time...boy. 

Second...let me take a drink....okay...GO!

When I hear people talk about "falling in love" with multiple partners, I hear, "I am lost..." 

A person who falls in love different people is trying to fill up a hole inside themselves...a hole that they think they can fill with that perfect, ideal love and relationship.  They are broken...and hope to get fixed by trying every tool in the toolbox (that's what she said).  A broken-ness that they feel (but can't verbalize) will be helped by someone else...They are searching...looking and trying to find pieces of themselves.  They are lost.

One of my favorite quotes on love comes from an inspired movie...a movie deep and filled with philosophical ooze...it's called "Wedding Crashers"

In it, Owen Wilson says something like, "love is the recognition of itself in another."  


Love is not a multiple choice test.  It's something that we choose to do because it requires our willingness to share our gifts with another.  A choosing to allow someone into our weird little worlds, a choosing to partner with them, not for them.  I do believe that we can love people in different ways and I believe that every single person in your life is there for a reason- but like milk they have expiration dates.

I do not believe in true love.  I believe in truly loving yourself.  When you can accept who you are, what you cherish, your values, your worth, your gifts and your story then "falling in love" doesn't exist...only sharing your love does.