Monday, November 24, 2008

32. Complimenting others

So I have a patient/client that first came into the office for feelings of depression and general anxiety. As a way to deal with his own emotions, he likes to compliment others as a way to spread good cheer and joy. So he comes into the office and says that "today I went to the library and I saw this girl there and as she was standing there I complimented her and simply walked off.""x amount of time afterward she comes to me taps me on the shoulder and starts to curse me out.""She says, 'I fucken hate how i'm always being hit on! why can't you fucken leave me alone and not hit on me for once...'"my client then says, "I'm sorry, I wasn't hitting on you though, I was just giving you a compliment...i'm happily married with kids but was just complimenting to be nice."she then storms off...My client is then, easily understood, depressed and unable to leave the house other then come to talk.I talk to my supervisor about his complimenting and my supervisor then tells me to advise him to stop since it brought him to an all time low...So let me just say that I find myself fighting about my supervisor and this was no exception...I believe that it's okay for him to compliment others and that I can talk to my patient about learning to accept that some people have bad days, like i think she was having and that he may expect to have bad reactions at times. My supervisor instead insists that I just tell him to stop completely and make him not compliment again...always the clashing I have with him....Ideas?

1 comment:

  1. I have to agree with you, because compliments are wonderful!!! They can bring a smile to someone who is having a bad day , but too what counts is the way a compliment is being made. For instance, if a guy just stares and has this creepy look to him as he compliments you, Red Alert!!!! Run!!!! but a nice compliment is always nice. Then you have the occasional , loud whistle followed by "Chula or Mamasita", so not cool......
    Sounds like your patient had a lot more going on and sometimes really getting down to those issues/fears then the rest appears to work itself out. A challenge with a supervisor can be good and healthy as well, I am always up for the challenge if I feel strongly toward something.

    ReplyDelete